Day 105: My Experiment
Monday Oct 29, 2018
Photo by TheDigitalArtist on Pixabay
Archetype of the Vampire Mother
The eagle pushes the eaglet out of the nest encouraging autonomy and the survival of the species.
The Vampire Mother micromanages, indoctrinates, and ultimately vicariously lives through the child. The child’s accomplishments are the accomplishments of the Mother. The child’s failures are the Mother’s failures. She energetically feeds off the child’s successes and failures.
She defines success and failure via her own expectations. She trips up her child’s attempts to break out on their own. She discourages, through relentless indoctrination, manipulation, and guilt, autonomy. If the child has its own life then where would she get her blood supply? She would have to look within.
The vampire Mother cannot explore novel options. Instead uses age old techniques to keep the child in her grips. Guilt is her weapon.
The vampire Mother cannot step out of the box for fear of losing her purpose. She has not succeeded living her own life so she lives through the child. The helpless child becomes her puppet.
The child may rebel or conform. Either way they give the Mother her blood supply. If the child rebels she can justify her ignorance by saying “you see if my child had only listened to me”. If the child conforms she can continue to blame the child for failures and revel in the child’s successes.
Never does the vampire Mother look at her own ignorance. She projects her un-lived life into her child. She never takes responsibility but makes the child responsible for her experience of life. She can be anyone: the smiling doting Mother, soft spoken, and positive. Her masks are well developed. She often controls though passive-aggressive tactics.
The vampire Mother is tricky. She gets others to side with her against the child. She bathes in: “oh look what you do for your child and they are so ungrateful.” ” You have sacrificed so much and done so much. Your child needs to be analyzed, drugged, or treated. What a good Mother you are!”
The child holds the Mother’s wound. The child cannot escape. Once bitten by the vampire Mother only one thing will set the child free: Responsibility for themselves and the courage to have integrity with self.
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#lying #truth #conflict #defensiveness #peace #being #beingness #relationshipgoals #compassion #shouldnot #should #honesty #leurbanretreat #selfinquiry #knowthyself